09 January 2015
Wedding Surprises
16 December 2014
How To Toothpaste
14 December 2014
Snowflakes
12 October 2014
Pirate Joe's
There are no Trader Joe's in Canada. But there is a Pirate Joe's:
"Pirate Joe’s isn’t technically engaging in piracy. The stock isn’t stolen (Hallatt pays retail to Trader Joe’s for all his stock), counterfeit (Hallatt’s products are advertised as Trader Joe’s products, and are in fact Trader Joe’s products), nor technically smuggled (Hallatt declares his haul at customs, and he doesn’t stock alcohol -- which is especially regulated). But Pirate Joe’s is dealing in a grey market, or the trade of a product outside of its official, authorized distribution channel. Authorized goods are white market, illegal goods are black market; grey market goods are somewhere in between."
"Pirate Joe’s isn’t technically engaging in piracy. The stock isn’t stolen (Hallatt pays retail to Trader Joe’s for all his stock), counterfeit (Hallatt’s products are advertised as Trader Joe’s products, and are in fact Trader Joe’s products), nor technically smuggled (Hallatt declares his haul at customs, and he doesn’t stock alcohol -- which is especially regulated). But Pirate Joe’s is dealing in a grey market, or the trade of a product outside of its official, authorized distribution channel. Authorized goods are white market, illegal goods are black market; grey market goods are somewhere in between."
Labels: random weirdness
05 May 2014
Quote of the Day: Tumblr
Seen here:
tumblr #1:
I remember the “selling their kid on ebay” story...
tumblr #2:
Who sells their kid on ebay? That’s nuts.
That’s a child. A living being that you made.
That shit goes on etsy.
tumblr #1:
I remember the “selling their kid on ebay” story...
tumblr #2:
Who sells their kid on ebay? That’s nuts.
That’s a child. A living being that you made.
That shit goes on etsy.
Labels: random weirdness
30 April 2014
Quote of the Day: Tumblr
Seen here:
Europeans: I drove forty minutes to the Netherlands for some groceries and then I popped into Germany to see some of my relatives before driving back home.
Americans: I was in Florida, I drove for nine hours, now I'm still in Florida.
Australians: I drove for nine hours, now I'm nine hours away from home, no one is here, the streets are empty, how did this happen, where has civilisation gone, I am alone in the universe, oh wait no there's an echidna it's okay
Europeans: I drove forty minutes to the Netherlands for some groceries and then I popped into Germany to see some of my relatives before driving back home.
Americans: I was in Florida, I drove for nine hours, now I'm still in Florida.
Australians: I drove for nine hours, now I'm nine hours away from home, no one is here, the streets are empty, how did this happen, where has civilisation gone, I am alone in the universe, oh wait no there's an echidna it's okay
Labels: random weirdness
20 April 2014
Quote of the Day: Tumblr
Seen here:
once i was babysitting my neighbor’s 6 year old and she asked me why i was so ugly and without thinking i said “i’m you from the future” and she cried for like 30 minutes
once i was babysitting my neighbor’s 6 year old and she asked me why i was so ugly and without thinking i said “i’m you from the future” and she cried for like 30 minutes
Labels: random weirdness
14 April 2014
Quote of the Day: Tumblr
Seen here:
tumblr #1: in movies when kids sneak out through their windows and im just like why dont you have screens in your windows who doesnt have screens in their windows what do you just let bees and bugs and birds and shit fly into your room what the fuck
tumblr #2: #literally just had to google that#apparently screens are widely used in Australia USA and Canada#in Europe we deal with stuff that comes through the window like a man(x)
tumblr #3: this is why you guys had the black plague.
tumblr #1: in movies when kids sneak out through their windows and im just like why dont you have screens in your windows who doesnt have screens in their windows what do you just let bees and bugs and birds and shit fly into your room what the fuck
tumblr #2: #literally just had to google that#apparently screens are widely used in Australia USA and Canada#in Europe we deal with stuff that comes through the window like a man(x)
tumblr #3: this is why you guys had the black plague.
Labels: random weirdness
30 March 2014
Quote of the Day: Tumblr
Seen here:
tumblr #1: tell me a story about how people survive in Minnesota. Because from my understanding it is a frozen, tundra-like, barren... well, not wasteland, but pretty close. With some targets.
tumblr #2: We wake at dawn because we can no longer sleep through the cold in our houses, the snow falling in clumps the size of baseballs.
Wind gusts shake the windows and icicles hang from the ceiling. We put on two pair of boots -- the regular boot and the government boot, which everyone receives before the first snowfall of the year. The Minnesota boot has 6 inch spikes to walk through the sheets of the ice that cover the land.
Only the eyes left exposed, to ensure that the cold of winter does not permeate our snow suits, which we make of old tarps and pillowcases stuffed with newspapers. They are all blaze orange so we can find the bodies of the frozen dead that litter our sidewalks. We travel in packs for safety, but if one falls, he/she is left behind to form a new pack or is eaten.
We walk together in hordes, blinded and freezing, climbing small mountains of snow and ice, until we see it in the distance: Target. The red sign is our winter sun, and it shines like a beacon across the horizon. We stumble toward it, rolling the last 20 feet across the parking lot because our legs have gone numb.
When we make it through the doors, emergency crews are there to wrap us in heat blankets and give us Starbucks. Some never make it this far. It is a perilous journey, but one we must make.
Together, from November to April, we are strong. We are cold. We are Minnesotan.
tumblr #1: tell me a story about how people survive in Minnesota. Because from my understanding it is a frozen, tundra-like, barren... well, not wasteland, but pretty close. With some targets.
tumblr #2: We wake at dawn because we can no longer sleep through the cold in our houses, the snow falling in clumps the size of baseballs.
Wind gusts shake the windows and icicles hang from the ceiling. We put on two pair of boots -- the regular boot and the government boot, which everyone receives before the first snowfall of the year. The Minnesota boot has 6 inch spikes to walk through the sheets of the ice that cover the land.
Only the eyes left exposed, to ensure that the cold of winter does not permeate our snow suits, which we make of old tarps and pillowcases stuffed with newspapers. They are all blaze orange so we can find the bodies of the frozen dead that litter our sidewalks. We travel in packs for safety, but if one falls, he/she is left behind to form a new pack or is eaten.
We walk together in hordes, blinded and freezing, climbing small mountains of snow and ice, until we see it in the distance: Target. The red sign is our winter sun, and it shines like a beacon across the horizon. We stumble toward it, rolling the last 20 feet across the parking lot because our legs have gone numb.
When we make it through the doors, emergency crews are there to wrap us in heat blankets and give us Starbucks. Some never make it this far. It is a perilous journey, but one we must make.
Together, from November to April, we are strong. We are cold. We are Minnesotan.
Labels: random weirdness
20 March 2014
Quote of the Day: Tumblr
11 March 2014
Quote of the Day: Welcome to NightVale
From the twitter:
"If you love something set if free. If it stays in place because it has long wooden roots buried deep in the earth, it was probably a tree."
"If you love something set if free. If it stays in place because it has long wooden roots buried deep in the earth, it was probably a tree."
Labels: random weirdness
05 March 2014
Quote of the Day: Very Short Story
Seen here:
"Mark applied sunscreen to Laura trying to keep her from burning. The time would have been better spent putting out the fire on the boat."
"Mark applied sunscreen to Laura trying to keep her from burning. The time would have been better spent putting out the fire on the boat."
Labels: random weirdness
26 February 2014
Quote of the Day: Tumblr
Seen here:
"good morning class, today we’ll be learning about how life is arbitrary and unfair. i didnt even read any of your essays but you all failed"
"good morning class, today we’ll be learning about how life is arbitrary and unfair. i didnt even read any of your essays but you all failed"
Labels: random weirdness
26 January 2014
Quote of the Day: Tumblr
Seen here:
Q: WHAT DO YOU AMERICANS MEAN WHEN A SHOW IS ON AT LIKE FUCKIN “8/7c” WHAT IS THAT????
A: We never switched over to metric timekeeping. The c stands for “Caw”, referring to how many times a majestic eagle has flown overhead and cawed that day. Sometimes the eagles are feeling sluggish, so the show could be on after either the 7th or 8th caw.
Q: WHAT DO YOU AMERICANS MEAN WHEN A SHOW IS ON AT LIKE FUCKIN “8/7c” WHAT IS THAT????
A: We never switched over to metric timekeeping. The c stands for “Caw”, referring to how many times a majestic eagle has flown overhead and cawed that day. Sometimes the eagles are feeling sluggish, so the show could be on after either the 7th or 8th caw.
Labels: random weirdness, TV
18 January 2014
Quote of the Day: Tumblr
Seen here:
tumblr 1: gotta love knitting needles. i can make a scarf. i can make a hat. i can stab your eyes out. i can make mittens.
tumblr 2: What was that middle part?
tumblr 1: i can make a hat
tumblr 1: gotta love knitting needles. i can make a scarf. i can make a hat. i can stab your eyes out. i can make mittens.
tumblr 2: What was that middle part?
tumblr 1: i can make a hat
Labels: random weirdness
16 December 2013
Quote of the Day: Very Short Story
Seen here:
”I have one rule for dating“ said Steph. ”You have to like me.“
”Do you like ME?“ Rich asked.
”You’re not listening“ she replied.
”I have one rule for dating“ said Steph. ”You have to like me.“
”Do you like ME?“ Rich asked.
”You’re not listening“ she replied.
Labels: random weirdness
02 September 2013
Quote of the Day: Tumblr
Seen here:
the year is 2025
scientists are still scrambling to figure out what “zigazig ahh” is so that they can give the spice girls what they really really want
the spice girls are getting impatient
war is upon us
the year is 2025
scientists are still scrambling to figure out what “zigazig ahh” is so that they can give the spice girls what they really really want
the spice girls are getting impatient
war is upon us
Labels: random weirdness
29 August 2013
Quote of the Day: Very Short Story
From the VeryShortStory twitter:
Nana rocked in her old wooden rocking chair. "Timmy, you have always been my favorite," she said.
He looked at her. "Nana, I’m Bobby."
Nana rocked in her old wooden rocking chair. "Timmy, you have always been my favorite," she said.
He looked at her. "Nana, I’m Bobby."
Labels: random weirdness
15 August 2013
Quote of the Day: Very Short Story
Very Short Story is a twitter account that tells a very short story in every tweet:
Yes, I'll marry you she said. Then I asked "you're picking ME right, not because I'm the last man on Earth?" She bit her lip. "Umm."
Yes, I'll marry you she said. Then I asked "you're picking ME right, not because I'm the last man on Earth?" She bit her lip. "Umm."
Labels: random weirdness
03 August 2013
Quote of the Day: Tumblr
Seen here:
"I always think of Canada as the lovechild of England and France after they had a drunken one night stand and England just left it to grow up with its big brother America who was like the rebel of the family."
"I always think of Canada as the lovechild of England and France after they had a drunken one night stand and England just left it to grow up with its big brother America who was like the rebel of the family."
Labels: random weirdness
